Fat Chance!

I was recently speaking with Dr. I. M. A. Chump, PhD; he is a graduate of Snap, Crackle and Pop University, who has written many books including Fatatouille Reasoning and Applying Calculus to Meal Planning. His latest theory is that you can lose weight by adding (the right) food to your plate, no matter what you are eating. Dr. Chump, who originally comes from a small village in the Ukraine named Chelm, told me that adding a healthy item to a meal decreases its potential to promote gain. Thus, by adding a stalk or two of celery to a meal consisting of a triple Whopper with Cheese, bacon and large fries and still lose weight. He told me that his paradoxical view is based on the fact that the promoting of healthful foods being added to an unhealthy menu makes people think they are consuming fewer calories than they actually are. His view is that the concern over bad food is what really puts on the weight. His study is being funded by the McDonald’s Foundation and Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream.